one thousand camels and thirty liters of bananas

The pyramids are a fickle mistress. We were pleased as punch, of course, to visit some of the most ancient structures in the world. We were somewhat less satisfied, however, with the numerous tourist traps, scams, and lush marriage proposals that seem to go hand in hand with these triangles of yore. Ah, Egypt: the land of civilization.

The pyramids at Giza. We left here feeling probably as hot and frustrated as our camels due to the constant tourist traps. Please note the ridiculous headscarves. They were placed forcefully on our heads.

The step pyramid at Saqqara. Please note again the ridiculous headscarf. Again, placed forcefully on our heads. This picture was taken by baqsheesh-seeking local who pretended to be in awe of our Arabic skills.


One of the pyramids at Dahshur. This pyramid requires a lengthy climb and descent to get inside, where it smells strongly of ammonia. If we had realized at the time that it was because of the large number of bats inhabiting the pyramid, we probably would have enjoyed the view from the outside.

After a long day of hot sand and too much baqsheesh, all we wanted to do was take a dip in the Nile. The locals tell us, however, that this is not very wise. So we settled for a bizarre cruise full of vacationing Arabs instead. The singing, belly dancing, and sufi dancing was all just fine, but when they broke out in an English version of "Hotel California," we were somewhat taken aback. But hey, at least the boat had free dessert and air conditioning. And in this so-called "land of civilization," that's really all we're looking for.